Crows’ Banterrific Banter: A Beginners Guide

The Aussies are widely regarded as masters of the art of sledging and ‘chit-chat’. Mark Ramprakash and Daryl Cullinan are amongst those who have suffered through their psychological manipulation. But were you to take a stroll round the New Crow Dome © on a Saturday afternoon, you might think they got off lightly. For the Crows are no slouches in this field. Many a meaningless utterance can be heard emanating from the mouths of some of Royston’s most arrogant and mischievous. Here is an explanation of what they mean, their origin and purpose. *

Come on the Crows - Self explanatory

The Crows are circling, it’s Murder Time – Used when the Crows are on top and smelling blood. A reference to thetendency for crows to circle over dead bodies. Often followed by mimicking of crows pecking and shrieking. 

I’m a Crow, here we go – Roystonian rhyming slang. Origins in one of Nobby’s infamous selection texts of 2006. Motivational. One can wear an “I’m a Crow, Here I Go” hat. Hence the phrase Hats On.

Light up the New Crow Dome© - Motivational. Use carried over from the Crow Dome.

It’s Crow Time – Motivational. Time for Royston to get on top.

A Bonis Ad Meliora – Motivational Latin. The Royston motto. Translation: From Good Things To Better.

1 Brings 2, 2 Brings 3, etc. – Used following a wicket. Psychological. Implies new batsman is vulnerable. Veteran batsman Kenneth Graham disagrees.

Leak/The Leak/Leakage/Leaky/Slug/Sluggage/Gimp – Nickname for Martyn Leek (note spelling).

Wasted on you/Only good players ‘Nik’ Those – Psychological. As used by Fred Trueman (converted to non-Yaaaarksire English). Used when bowler beats the outside edge.

Come on the Templar – Motivational.Play on words with surname of talisman Richard Temple, and Royston’s Knights Templar history.

A Rootin’ Tootin’ Christopher Hooton/Hootoooooooooon/Hooter/The Sultan of Swing -  Gee ups for our very own Hooton Jnr.

Hoggy/Hoggster/The Hogg/Hogwarts/Hogfather/Didier Hogba/Ace of Sladez – Nicknames for Matthew Hoggard look-a-like Dave Sladen.

Tickle those Timbers – In memory of Martin Goff.

The Therfield Special – Psychological. The New Crow Dome© is well known for producing magical deliveries which rarely bounce. Known locally as The Therfield Special. Often used in conjunction with Ms. Leek and Temple’s love for curry.

Postman Pat/Chunky/Millhouse – Nicknames for Paul Miller.

Row them up/Keep Rowing Miller – While running, members of the Miller family use their bat as an imaginary paddle. Watching them run can be so painful you would think they are actually wading.

Eyes on the Prize – Royston rhyming slang. Motivational. Reminding players to remain focused on the job in hand: winning. It is hoped eyes will be more focused this season than last.

Eyes on the Squirrel – The squirrel is a mythical creature. By following the squirrel, players give themselves the best chance of success. Can be motivational or psychological.  

Pratt’s Ashes – Used to commend outstanding fielding. A reference to Ashes hero Garry Pratt.

Sorry – Fielders are often heard apologising to opposition batsman when Craig Jackson pipes up.